- 1 Friendship activities
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Roman: Niko, as you are my cousin I want you to use family business how you like. Any time you want cab, you call me.
Niko: Thank you, cousin. That could be very useful in this city.
Roman: Niko, you do not know how great it is to have you here with me. Before you arrived in Liberty City, things were terrible.
Niko: I still remember the emails you sent me, cousin. You should have told me how bad things were in this country before I got here.
Roman: Okay, things aren't easy for us here. But together, we are doing alright. America is an opportunity for a new beginning. You were in need of one.
Niko: There is no such thing as a new beginning, Roman. With every day we live we pick up new baggage, baggage that we must carry with us for the rest of our lives. There's no dropping it and pretending we are fresh and clean just because we get off a boat in a new place.
Roman: Stop being so dramatic, Niko. Time is a healer. We live and we forget the past. Nothing helps a man forget like ripe, round American titties. You have to move on from the things that happened to you and think about all the opportunities in this country. Chances to make lots of money, chances to get college girls into bed.
Niko: Chances to turn into an asshole.
Roman: I heard that. I haven't forgotten our language completely.
Roman: Niko B in the house... man, sometimes, I cannot believe you are here with me, really I can't.
Niko: It's hardly been a lot of fun since I turned up cousin.
Roman: Correct - it has been a fucking nightmare. But that's not the point.
Roman: No, the point is, fuck it. The Bellic cousins are here in the land of opportunity and we are making trouble for any fools who get in our way.
Niko: If you say so.
Roman: I do say so, man, I do. I just did. It's good to have you here. Whatever shit we get into, man... it's good.
Niko: Thanks. Don't you miss home? You've been here a long time. You never get home sick?
Roman: Sure. I miss things about home, but I, I... I think things are ruined now.
Niko: Yes. I know what you mean.
Roman: I miss the good times we had as children, when our fathers were too drunk to beat us, when there was food and the sun was shining, but... Now - now I live here. And life is good.
Niko: Is it?
Roman: Yes, cousin. It is. Sure, this place is crazy, but so was home. And here, it is okay to be an eccentric go-getter businessman with a taste for fine woman, wine and song.
Niko: Is that how you see yourself? My God, you are deranged, cousin. This place has made you sick!
Roman: Fuck you. I'm an individual, my friend. One of a kind.
Niko: Or to put it another way, a freak.
Roman: Man, I love this country. It's fucking amazing.
Niko: I want some of what you're on. It must be pretty strong because I can't see what you're happy about. Life is shit.
Roman: I'm high on life, man. American life. It's the fast-food, the cheap gas, the fake titties - there's a short cut for everything here. You just need to know where it is.
Niko: Yeah, but most people don't know where it is so they stay at the bottom of the food chain. They stay there until they're burnt out or dead.
Roman: That's because people are to foolish to look for the shortcuts. They stay on the highway like every other chump. I'm an innovator, Niko. I drive off the highway. Off road baby! Every move I make is a gamble. I'm going to get knocked back a few times, sure. But one day I'll find that short cut to the top. If you're lucky I might take you there with me.
Niko: Tell me, Roman, why weren't you such an optimist back home?
Roman: In the Old Country, the only thing you could count on was a bomb landing on your bedroom roof in the night. Here, anything is possible. It's the land of opportunity. They must put something into the water, man, because all I'm feeling is pure optimism.
Niko: I'm going to start drinking from the tap then.
Roman: How are you, cousin?
Roman: Good. Listen, Niko. I received an email from your mother?
Roman: She said she'd sent you an email.
Roman: You know, I'm worried about her, all alone. Maybe... maybe she should move here, be with us?
Niko: Yes - maybe she get heavily involved in car jacking and spend some time doing hits for the mob? Look at how we live here, what we have done. Where exactly would your aunt fit into this lifestyle?
Roman: It was just an idea. I thought maybe she'd find America exciting.
Niko: Yes - she loves crack dealers. Don't you remember? How she couldn't move back on our farm because of all of the heroin dealers and the coke whores and the arms smugglers? She would love it here!
Roman:You know, I love your mother - there is just one thing I could never figure out about her. One terrible black mark against her.
Niko: How she raised such a prick of a son.
Roman: Very funny.
Niko: I know. I think it's pretty funny.
Roman: What do you think about America, Niko? Tell me straight. You love it, no?
Niko: I don't know, Roman. It is the same as any other place only louder. People don't know how to shut up here.
Roman: I bet you would like to teach them, wouldn't you cousin? But you can't or at least you can't teach everyone. Really, you don't like it? The lights, the titties, the food, the opportunities. Come on, Niko. It's kind of incredible.
Niko: It's stupid. Everything is just advertising with nothing to back it up. They tell you you're eating the best burger ever and you believe it until you're sweating out all the chemicals in it and the hormones are making your balls feel funny.
Roman: My balls feel fine, but I did notice my man tits getting larger when I was eating at Cluckin' Bell every day.
Niko: Everything else is fake too. The titties aren't real and the opportunities aren't opportunities at all. To seize them you end up in so much debt that you'll be a slave for the rest of your life.
Roman: I cannot believe what you are saying. Do you seriously mean that you don't like fake titties, cousin?
Roman: It's good to hang out again, Niko. How are you doing man?
Niko: Fantastic! Look at my life. I have stumbled from one disaster to another, and now I am here, and it is another disaster.
Roman: Yeah, good point. My God. For a sociopathic killer, you're also a really miserable bastard.
Niko: Thanks, man.
Roman: I'm sorry, but listen, man, you have to lighten up. Enjoy yourself.
Niko: Enjoy what?
Roman: Enjoy this. Us hanging out, living in this lunatic asylum, meeting freaks. It is fun, I think... and if it isn't fun, it's all we can do anyway.
Roman: Not "maybe" - yes - definitely true.
Niko: Okay. Thank you. I will lighten up, learn how to juggle, maybe get work in a dance troupe?
Roman: You dancing? Now that I would like to see. Like the death throes of an elephant.
Niko: Thanks cousin. You really know how to make me feel good about myself.
Roman: Don't mention it.
Roman: Avoid it as long as you can, cousin. That's my advice to you.
Niko: Avoid what?
Roman: The old ball and chain, the chastity belt they call a serious relationship. I love Mallorie but come on. A man has his urges. It is impossible sometimes.
Niko: But you lover her, don't you?
Roman: She's the love of my life, the woman of my dreams... she's amazing. It's just tough. Maybe it'd be easy if I was not an attractive man, but, sadly, I was not blessed with plain features. Not matter where I go, the ladies love me. It's that Bellic blood. They can't resist, can they?
Niko: Maybe you have different Bellic blood than me.
Roman: If women weren't throwing themselves at me, life would be easier. They make this hard for me, if only I was unattractive. I guess it's stupid to wish for the impossible. I'll just have to learn to live with the temptation.
Niko: Good luck with that, Roman.
Roman: How you doing, cousin?
Niko: And you? How are you?
Roman: Me? I'm always the same. You know me. I'm an optimist. Life is always great.
Niko: You're always waiting for tomorrow.
Roman: Maybe. It feels better than always mourning yesterday.
Niko: I guess.
Roman: But what a yesterday! Man, this has been a crazy time. We've had some insane adventures.
Niko: Yes - it's been crazy for me for seventeen years. For you too but in a different way. We grew up wanting to be free. And look what freedom was. War, killing, and not even knowing what to hate anymore.
Roman: And hot tubs and fast cars and the chance to do what the hell you want.
Niko: Maybe. Sometimes it feels like I do what the hell others want.
Roman: Oh, stop complaining. You're pathetic. The one thing this country has taught you is how to wine.
Niko: Fuck you.
Roman: That's better. Grow some fucking balls.
Niko: I will, when you grow a brain.
Roman: You are looking at a reformed man, Niko.
Niko: Who? Where? Point him out, will you?
Roman: Don't be stupid, I'm talking about myself. I've come through the tunnel and seen the light. My gambling problem is under control.
Niko: Really? I bet you ten dollars it isn't.
Roman: Ha ha, very funny. I'm serious. I only bet on sure things now. I'll only back a horse if the competition is doped, I'll only bet on a game of football if it's fixed. In poker, I play super tight - Buffet Car Jancowitz style. I only play the top ten hands.
Niko: That still sounds like you are gambling, Roman.
Roman: It's not gambling if you're guaranteed a win, Niko. That is the whole meaning of the word. There's no risk in what I'm doing.
Niko: Sure, Roman. I will believe it when I see your winnings.
Roman: Whats up, NB?
Niko: Not much, cousin, what's up with you?
Roman: Not too much - I was remembering the Old Country, when we were children.
Niko: It's a long time ago. A different world.
Roman: A different life at least. Remember all those kids?
Niko: Sure. Most of them are dead.
Roman: Some, yes, but not most. What happened to Marko?
Niko: I don't know. I lost contact. I think he went to Britain. Or to University. I don't know.
Roman: What about, err... Mila?
Niko: Fuck you!
Roman: Niko Bellic - still likes Mila Tadic.
Niko: Gimme a break.
Roman: But Mila Tadic prefers Roman... it's a terrible love triangle.
Niko: Screw you.
Roman: She did. Many times. But trust me, cousin. She was no good. I think she was the town bike - it was like a cavern.
Niko: You're disgusting.
Roman: You ever think about going back home, cousin?
Niko: I promised myself I wouldn't go home until I had resolved certain problems. I wish I could be with my mother, but there is nothing left for me there other than her. What about you?
Roman: Your mother is there, but for me there is nothing. The Old Country stopped being home for me when Mama was taken from me in the war. Here is my home now.
Niko: Things are alright back home now.
Roman: My mother would be here if she was still alive. She was such a strong woman. She'd have to be to deal with my pig of a father.
Niko: I was sorry to hear of his death, Roman. We have not spoken about it.
Roman: That is very kind of you, cousin, but you would be the only one who was sorry that he died. His only kind words were for the men who'd lend him money to get drunk with.
Niko: Just like my father then.
Roman: More than a family resemblance made them brothers, Niko. We know this. At least they didn't fuck us up though. For all their drunken meanness, we made it through. We're normal. We have healthy emotional lives.
Niko: I think you must speak for yourself there. Not many would call me emotionally balanced.
Roman: Not many know you as well as I do. You're a big softie at heart. You're not as cold as you make out, cousin.
Roman: You good, cousin?
Niko: I guess.
Roman: You sure? Listen man. I'm worried about you. You have to sort your life out. Before it ends.
Niko: What does that mean?
Roman: It means what it says - you can't carry on like this - fighting a war that ended, killing, running around like a lunatic, all this craziness.
Niko: You got me into this craziness, here I mean. And you help me spend the money it has made us.
Roman: Sure, but it can't go on, not forever.
Niko: Yes it can.
Roman: You'll die.
Niko: No. I will go on forever. This is my curse. I can do this. Live this life. I cannot live another. Not now.
Roman: I don't buy that bullshit. Grow up, move on, be, be free! At least think about it?
Roman: We're going to make it big, cousin.
Niko: Are we?
Roman: We are.
Niko: What do you mean?
Roman: I mean we're going to make it big.
Niko: What's that? What's big?
Roman: What I've been saying ever since I started sending you emails. We're going to be on top. Fast cars, Jacuzzis, hot women, we're going to have everything we could ever dream of. I can feel it. The cousins Bellic. On top of the world.
Niko: Take a look at the history of this city, Roman. The old white men who run the city today, their fathers ran it before them, and their fathers before them. The same names are on the news buildings as that are on the old ones.
Roman: Alright Mr. I-know-the-history-of-this-city, what is it that you want? What are you hoping for?
Niko: To get by, to have a life that isn't totally shit, for things to be a little easier. You've been watching too much I'm Rich on the TV, cousin.
Roman: No, I'm going to be on I'm Rich, cousin. If you're lucky, I'll let you come around my house when they're filming. They can shoot you in the hot tub.
Niko: Great, thank you, I can't wait.
Roman: You good man?
Roman: Me too. I mean, it's nonstop craziness, but I'm happy. You, you know what? I'm glad you came here. It's good to be living in this madhouse with family.
Roman: Before you got here, I was on the bottom - people spat on me.
Niko: And now?
Roman: Now they still spit on me, but at least I know I have you here. It's been tough, but I've had a great time.
Niko: Thank you cousin. I am glad I came here too. Not because of the place. It's interesting, but also strange. Too noise. I am glad because of you. To have a real friend in the world, that was all I think I ever wanted, and in you, I have that person.
Roman: Thank you, cousin.
Niko: You are the man I wanted to be, Roman - happy, kind and a good person.
Roman: And you are the man I wanted to be - strong, unbending, with integrity. Life is very strange.
- Phone call for taxi service
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