Just or Unjust/Script: Difference between revisions
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'''ANNOUNCER: '''Justice is a game. Just like the game of Chicken. You've gotta go full steam ahead, and hope the other person runs out of energy or money first. It takes money to play the game right, and get out on top. | '''ANNOUNCER: '''Justice is a game. Just like the game of Chicken. You've gotta go full steam ahead, and hope the other person runs out of energy or money first. It takes money to play the game right, and get out on top. | ||
JUDGE GRADY: In this court, it's a world where good deeds go undone. Morality is ''severly'' punished, and random luck can destroy your life. I'm Judge Grady, and this is Just or Unjust. | '''JUDGE GRADY:''' In this court, it's a world where good deeds go undone. Morality is ''severly'' punished, and random luck can destroy your life. I'm Judge Grady, and this is Just or Unjust. | ||
''(Intense rock music starts to play)'' | ''(Intense rock music starts to play)'' | ||
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''(Theme music ends, and a gavel is banged)'' | ''(Theme music ends, and a gavel is banged)'' | ||
'''JUDGE GRADY:''' Okay. Let's get on with this. Welcome to my courtroom. I'm Judge Grady. Let's get some justice...right! Today we got Williams-Jones against Williams-Jones, case number 453. Let's get going. I've already read your opening statements. | '''JUDGE GRADY:''' Okay. Let's get on with this. Welcome to my courtroom. I'm Judge Grady. Let's get some justice...right! Today we've got Williams-Jones against Williams-Jones, case number 453. Let's get going. I've already read your opening statements. | ||
'''LAURIE:''' Judge Grady, my name is Laurie Williams-Jones. I've been married to my husband Chuck for two years, and all he does is play that wizard online game, Lootenwank. He plays until two in the morning sometimes! ''(audience gasps)'' When he comes to bed, he's all grabbing my ass and treating me like a troll, screaming "Too damage! Too damage! Check that ass in the air, troll, I'm about to get agro!" ''(audience moans)'' Can you help me, Judge? I love my husband but I am ''not'' an avatar. | '''LAURIE:''' Judge Grady, my name is Laurie Williams-Jones. I've been married to my husband Chuck for two years, and all he does is play that wizard online game, Lootenwank. He plays until two in the morning sometimes! ''(audience gasps)'' When he comes to bed, he's all grabbing my ass and treating me like a troll, screaming "Too damage! Too damage! Check that ass in the air, troll, I'm about to get agro!" ''(audience moans)'' Can you help me, Judge? I love my husband but I am ''not'' an avatar. | ||
Revision as of 11:05, 21 June 2010
WKTT ANNOUNCER: WKTT. Because the battle for America... begins here. WKTT 1066. We Know The Truth!
(Dramatic music starts to play)
ANNOUNCER: Justice is a game. Just like the game of Chicken. You've gotta go full steam ahead, and hope the other person runs out of energy or money first. It takes money to play the game right, and get out on top.
JUDGE GRADY: In this court, it's a world where good deeds go undone. Morality is severly punished, and random luck can destroy your life. I'm Judge Grady, and this is Just or Unjust.
(Intense rock music starts to play)
ANNOUNCER: The excitement of a court show...
WOMAN #1: He kicked me in the stomach, Your Honor!
ANNOUNCER: The injustice of an American courtroom...
JUDGE GRADY: I think the wetlands are overprotected anyway. I fine you a million dollars for wasting the court's time! (gavel bangs) You activist scum!
ANNOUNCER: The tension of a desperate network television show...
MAN: I don't care what your definition of sodomize is! I'm gonna show you mine!
(Audience applauds)
ANNOUNCER: All packed together, with the incredible excitement of a game show...
JUDGE GRADY: Do you love money? Do you? DO YOU?
WOMAN #2: (sobbing) Yes?
JUDGE GRADY: Well then, unbutton that blouse!
(Audience cheers)
ANNOUNCER: This is Just or Unjust. Real plaintiffs and defendants in a radio court of law.
(Theme music ends, and a gavel is banged)
JUDGE GRADY: Okay. Let's get on with this. Welcome to my courtroom. I'm Judge Grady. Let's get some justice...right! Today we've got Williams-Jones against Williams-Jones, case number 453. Let's get going. I've already read your opening statements.
LAURIE: Judge Grady, my name is Laurie Williams-Jones. I've been married to my husband Chuck for two years, and all he does is play that wizard online game, Lootenwank. He plays until two in the morning sometimes! (audience gasps) When he comes to bed, he's all grabbing my ass and treating me like a troll, screaming "Too damage! Too damage! Check that ass in the air, troll, I'm about to get agro!" (audience moans) Can you help me, Judge? I love my husband but I am not an avatar.