Kirk Simplex

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Kirk Simplex

Kirk Simplex is a hedge fund manager in Grand Theft Auto IV. In 2008 alone, he had made $3 billion. He married Samantha Muldoon, which lasted twenty minutes (among other celebrity marriages in the in-game media that last under a week, this is possibly meant to mock Britney Spears' 55-hour marriage to Jason Alexander, a childhood friend of hers). He once bought eight different historic English castles, decking some out with tacky, modern fittings, and burning down others to increase the value of the former. In a later interview, he states that he bought the castles shopping online while drunk, and regretted the purchases.