|Full Name||Reed Brazier|
|Main Affiliations||Daily Rag (employer)|
Los Santos Transit Authority to shut streets?
- After Father/Son
The Los Santos Transit Authority announced a 16 billion dollar project to install a network of streetcar rails throughout the city. "People love streetcars. They are in a lot of old movies, and you can jump on or off. And sometimes a woman gets on the streetcar in tears, and it starts to pull away, and then you chase after it, but it's too fast, and you never see her again. So you go to a boozy gin mill and pick up a floozy sitting next to you, secretly loathing her and yourself. We think this will be a big boost to tourism." City official Jack Ingram said. Others say that it's a massive waste of money in a town addicted to cars. Still others say they welcome the streetcars as something new to throw yourself in front of.
Nerds still stiff for stiff.
- After Friends Reunited
Murder nerds are still going crazy for Leonora Johnson, the beautiful starlet who was hacked to death nearly 40 years ago in a crime that has never been solved. The murder has long fascinated a section of Los Santos crime aficionados and recently some believe there may have been a breakthrough in the long cold case. A slip of the tongue from movie executive Ira Richards led some to believe that his grandfather, Vinewood legend David Richards may have destroyed a confession letter shortly before he died. Various people are still trying to find remnants of the letter and see who wrote it. Mr Richards now claims he was misquoted and that this is a non story but that hasn't put off amateur detectives who have long believed a Vinewood cover-up helped protect a powerful killer who may still walk among us.
Private jet crashes in Senora Desert – dead include key witness.
- After Caida Libre
A private jet bound for Liberty City has crashed in the Senora Desert killing everybody on board, in what police are calling extremely suspicious circumstances. The plane was carrying Javier Madrazo, a key witness in a case against a Los Santos based drug cartel, whose cousin Martin Madrazo, is alleged to be an organized crime kingpin.
Rocky Danger sent to glue factory in sky.
- After Monkey Business
Fans of his movies are outraged that Rocky Danger might not get a star on the Walk of Fame in Vinewood. The legendary horse starred in western movies like 'Annie is a Walkin Funny Now', 'Two Boots for Betty' and 'Buckin Bronco Bitches'. Some of the biggest names in pornography performed with the horse, who starred in numerous western adult films before retiring to an abattoir.
Funerals get flavor as bodies are put in action poses.
- After Eye in the Sky
How do you want your funeral to be? Most people don't think about such morbid things, assuming this party will last forever and that your body can take it. But local funeral director Frank Fernworthy has customers excited about to plan their arrangements with "adventure funerals". Rather than lying in a casket, the deceased are facing eternity on a bass boat, motorcycle, indoor climbing wall, felching, yoga or indeed any other activity they enjoyed. Fernworthy says he even did a special arrangement for porn stars Heather Sparkles and Johnny Roger who died performing a sex scene while on large amounts of speed.