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The following are '''dialog and mission scripts''' as seen during "[[The Cousins Bellic]]" in [[Grand Theft Auto IV]].
The following is a '''script''' of the mission "[[The Cousins Bellic]]" in [[Grand Theft Auto IV]].


== Script ==
== Script ==
'''Dave Bosoy''': Daddy's back, you bitches... Daddy's back, you bitches!


''The whole game starts with the picture fading from black, showing an erotically dressed woman hitting a man, ([[Dave]]), with a sado whip. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': Dave, come on. [knocking on door] Come on Dave.


[[Dave Bosoy|Dave]]: “Daddy’s back, you bitches… Daddy’s back, you bitches!”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Niko? What are you doing?


''Outside the door stands GTA IV’s main character, Niko Bellic, knocking at the door. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': Dave is not coming.


[[Niko Bellic]]: “Dave, come on. Come on, Dave!”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Ah, ignore him. Come on we got to get this thing ready before we dock.


''Another man comes into the picture''
(''Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy climb a ladder to a higher deck'')


[[Hossan Ramzy]] : “Niko, what are you doing?”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Let's go. Here, pass me that. There. Whooh yeah! There she is... Liberty City.


Niko: “Dave, he's not coming”
'''Niko Bellic''': Yeah.


Hossan: “Ah, ignore him. Come on, we got to get this thing ready before we dock. Let’s go”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': You ever been?


''Niko follows Hossan. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': No.
''Camera is set outside, showing the boat they’re on. ''


Hossan: “Here, pass me that. There”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Crazy place, Niko.


''Niko gives him his baggage and climbs up the ladder. The two men spot the big city''
'''Niko Bellic''': What you going to do?


Hossan: “Whooh, yeah! There she is… Liberty City.”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': I might come back on board... or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say, it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big... own a nice place, get a dog, a house... live the dream!


Niko: “Yeah”
'''Niko Bellic''': Like my cousin.


Hossan: “You ever been?
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Oh yeah?


Niko: “No”
'''Niko Bellic''': Yes - he's got the lot - house, women, cars, parties... he writes me in these wild emails, and after I got into trouble, I thought maybe uh... and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget... After the war finished, I couldn't get a job, nobody could... so I, uh, did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots...


Hossan: “Crazy place, Niko.
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Ahh, we all do dumb things... that's what makes us human.


''Inside the boat are some people rigging up a car to a platform. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': Could be.
''Picture is coming to Niko again''


Niko: “What you going to do?”
(''Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy disembark and Niko waits for his cousin'')


Hossan: “I might come back on board… or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say; it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big… own a nice place, get a dog, a house… Live the dream!
'''Roman Bellic''': Niko! My cousin! I can't believe it! You're here!


Niko: “Like my cousin.”
'''Niko Bellic''': Hey!


Hossan: “Oh yeah?”
'''Roman Bellic''': Welcome to America!


Niko: “ Yes – he’s got the lot – house, women, cars, parties… he writes me these wild emails, and after I got into trouble I thought maybe uh… and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget…”
'''Niko Bellic''': ''Good to see you, cousin.''


''The picture shows the other crew men again, showing a cook putting diamonds in his baking. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': What?


Niko: “After the war finished I couldn’t get a job, nobody could… So I did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots.”
'''Niko Bellic''': Good to see you, man - what, you forget our language?


Hossan: “Ahh, we all do dumb things. That’s what makes us human.
'''Roman Bellic''': Uhhh... ''cabbages?'' Maybe a little. I've been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned off the English girls with the big...


Niko: “Could be.
'''Niko Bellic''': Hey, a little... not so good.


''The boat docks. A machine lifts the car from the boat and onto the dock. All the people on the boat gets off to the dock, running to their awaiting girlfriends or other family. Everybody, except Niko. A man bumps into Niko. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Ahh, you'll be fine. Better than my Serbian. So good to see you cousin. I can't believe you made it! Ha! Shit... I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I've made it!


Niko: “Hey!”
(''Roman Bellic stumbles around'')


''Soon every person has left the dock. Niko is standing there waiting. The camera is filming the road outside the docks, showing a car driving towards the docks at full speed. The car is skidding, narrowly missing a moving platform holding a car. Niko’s smiling, realizing it’s his cousin driving the car''
'''Roman Bellic''': Shit, man, I'm still a touch drunk.


[[Roman Bellic]]: “Niko! My cousin! I can’t believe it, you’re here!”
'''Niko Bellic''': A touch?


Niko: “Hey!
'''Roman Bellic''': My cousin is here!


Roman: “Welcome to America!
'''Niko Bellic''': Woah! Roman, Roman, come on, come on, relax.


Niko: (In Serbian) “''Good to see you, cousin''.”
'''Roman Bellic''': We're going to rule the world!


Roman: “What?
'''Dock worker #1''': Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy. Just take over the world someplace else, alright?


Niko: “Good to see you, man – what, you forgot our language?”
'''Dock worker #2''': Yeah, buddy! Take off!


Roman: “Uhhh… ''cabbages''?
'''Dock worker #1''': You're in the Goddamn way.


:''Note: when the a word in a sentence in the script is written with both bold and Italic text, like the word cabbages above, it is in a different language; in this case, Serbian. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Screw you... screw you all!


Roman: “Maybe a little. I’ve been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned of the English girls with the big…”
'''Dock worker #2''': Hey, come on, man!


Niko: “Hey, a little… not so good”
'''Roman Bellic''': My cousin is here! Niko Bellic! He's the fucking man, bitches!


Roman: “Ahh, you’ll be fine. Better than my Serbian.
'''Niko Bellic''': Roman, come on, let's go... to the mansion, eh?


''He grabs Nikos baggage''
'''Roman Bellic''': Yes, the mansion! Whoa.


Roman: “So good to see you, cousin. I can’t believe you made it! Ha! Shit… I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I’ve made it.”
(''Roman Bellic stumbles'')


''He puts his baggage into his rear trunk. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Maybe you should drive...
''He opens a bottle of unspecified vodka and drinks it.''


Roman: “Shit, man, I’m still a touch drunk.
'''Niko Bellic''': Maybe I should.


''He nearly falls over''
'''Roman Bellic''': Okay!


Niko: “A touch?
'''Niko Bellic''': Okay. Hey is this a cab? Where's the sports car?


''Roman starts to shout out. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Err, it's in the shop... come on!


Roman: “My cousin is here!”
(''Niko Bellic begins to drive Roman Bellic back to his 'mansion''')


''Some workers look over at the commotion Roman's causing. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it's just up the road. I'll let you know when we're there.


Niko: “Woah! Roman, come on. Come on, relax.”
(''Niko Bellic continues driving Roman Bellic home'')


Roman: “We’re going to rule the world!”
'''Niko Bellic''': Why don't you show me around the city?


:“Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy.
'''Roman Bellic''': Fucking terrorists.


Worker 2: “Just take over the world someplace else, alright?
'''Niko Bellic''': What?


Worker 1: “Yeah, buddy!”
'''Roman Bellic''': Terrorists. There's been a big scare and you can't go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa, I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.


Worker 2: “You’re in the goddamn way.”
(''Niko drives past the cab depot'')


Roman: “Screw you… Screw you all! My cousin is here!”
'''Roman Bellic''': That is my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money.


Niko: “Hey, come on, man!”
or:


Roman: “Niko Bellic! He’s the fucking man, bitches!”
'''Roman Bellic''': We are passing the cab office, Niko. This is the business that will take us to the top of the pile.


Niko: “Roman, come on, let’s go… to the mansion, eh?“
'''Roman Bellic''': Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with? ''I thought I had died and gone to heaven, man.''


Roman: “Yes, the mansion! Whoah.
'''Niko Bellic''': ''I can't prove that I have.''


''Roman stumbles.''
'''Roman Bellic''': Cousin, it's been too long... you should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you've been missing out on!


Roman: “Maybe you should drive…”
'''Niko Bellic''': Our country has women too.


Niko: “Maybe I should.
'''Roman Bellic''': Yes, but only locals. Here we have white, black, the Puerto Ricans and the Asians, Europeans on vacation, scared Canadians, bored housewives from the Midwest - every possible choice. The city is like a big Uder Milken Ice Cream shop: thirty-six flavors of titty. Hove Beach is our little corner of Eastern Europe.


Roman: “Okay!”
'''Niko Bellic''': ''What a charming image.'' Hove Beach, next to the docks. Immigrants here do not make it very far from the boats they come in on.


Niko: “Okay. Hey, is this a cab? Where’s the sports car?”
'''Roman Bellic''': No, everyone seems happy where they are. It reminds them of the Black Sea or something - people leave home to hang around the people they ran away from, ''very odd''. Is just temporary for us though. Our sights are set for the top. Mansions in Berchem, penthouse in Algonquin... a model on each arm - me and my cousin Niko, rulers of the world!


Roman: “Err, it’s in the shop… come on!”
(''Niko drives Roman to his apartment'')


----
'''Niko''': This is the mansion?


''Now it’s the player driving.''
'''Roman''': Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That's the dream... follow me.


Roman: “Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it’s just up the road. I’ll let you know when we’re there.”
(''Niko and Roman enter the apartment'')


Niko: “Why don’t you show me around the city?”
'''Roman''': Come in, come in! Make yourself at home... what's mine is yours!


Roman: “Fucking terrorists”
(''Roman stamps on a cockroach'')


Niko: “What?”
'''Roman''': Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn't care.


Roman: “Terrorists! There has been a big scare and you can’t go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa. I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.”
(''Roman wipes the cockroach of his shoe'')


''The Cousins Bellic drive past Roman's cab depot. ''
'''Roman''': Oh... shit... oh, that's not nice. Ah, cousin, it's so good to see you! Yeah! Hmm...


Roman: “That’s my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money. Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with? ''I thought I had died and gone to Heaven, man''.”
(''Roman lies down on the bed'')


Niko: “''I can’t prove that I have''.
'''Roman''': Shit... well, I needed to change anyway... So!


Roman: “Cousin, It’s been too long… You should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you’ve been missing out on!”
'''Niko''': So...


''Roman's cab stops outside a mediocre apartment building in Hove Beach. ''
'''Roman''': So...


Niko: “This is the mansion?
'''Niko''': So, you full of crap, or what?


Roman: “Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That’s the dream… Follow me.”
'''Roman''': What?


----
'''Niko''': Where's luxury condo? Where's sports car? Where's Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?


''They’re walking in''
''''Roman''': What you talking about?


'''Niko''': In your letters to my [[Milica Bellic|mother]], in your letters to me... all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Sports cars, condos, women, money, the beach... opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches.


'''Roman''': That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!


Roman: “Come in, come in! Make yourself at home… what’s mine is yours!”
'''Niko''': Screw you, you idiot!


''Roman runs forward, and stomps on a cockroach''
'''Roman''': Okay, I'm an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.


Roman: “Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn’t care…”
'''Niko''': Yeah, this I know. Asshole.


'''Roman''': But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?


'''Niko''': What? What about me?


Roman: “Oh… shit… Oh, that’s not nice… Ah, cousin, it’s so good to see you! Yeah!”
'''Roman''': Well... why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you're running around with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you're here. You never tell me anything.


''Roman jumps onto his bed and lands on another cockroach.''
'''Niko''': Huh. No.


Roman: “Shit.. well, I needed to change anyway. So!”
'''Roman''': What do you mean no?


Niko: “So…”
'''Niko''': No, I never tell you anything. Another time.


Roman: “So…”
'''Roman''': Oooh, mystery man... strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?


Niko: “So, you full of crap, or what?
'''Niko''': Screw you! No, no, it's nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war... we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!


Roman: “What?
'''Roman''': Huh! No! No way! What's the time? Shit... I've got to get the cab back. It's on a shift.


Niko: “Where’s luxury condo? Where’s sports car? Where’s Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?”
(''Roman drinks his coffee but spits it back out'')


Roman: “What you talking about?”
'''Roman''': Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it...


Niko: “In your letters to my mother, in your letters to me… all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Cars, parties, women, money, the beach… opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches!”
'''Niko''': Roman...


Roman: “That’s right, I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!”
'''Roman''': Niko, I've got to run, come meet me at the cab office.


Niko: “Screw you, you idiot!”
'''Niko''': Jesus... what?


Roman: “Okay, I’m an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.
'''Roman''': It's easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner...


Niko: “Yeah, this I know. Asshole.
'''Niko''': What are you talking about? I don't...


Roman: “But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?”
'''Roman''': Go down one block and turn right on Iroquois...


Niko: “What? What about me?”
'''Niko''': I'm new here...


Roman: “Well… why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you’re running with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you’re here. You never tell me anything.
'''Roman''': then walk all the way down and we're right there on the left of the corner of Cisco Street.


Niko: “Huh.. No. “
'''Niko''': What are you talking about, man?


Roman: “What do you mean ‘no’?”
'''Roman''': It's really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors... Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here cousin... I've got something for you.


Niko: “No, I never tell you anything. Another time.”
(''Roman's phone rings'')


Roman: “Oooh, mystery man… strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?”
'''Roman''': Oh, damn... damn, damn, damn!


Niko: “Screw you! No, no, it’s nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse…
(''Roman answers his phone'')


''Niko turns over to Roman. He is asleep''
'''Roman''': Yes, [[Vladimir Glebov|Vlad]], sorry, forgive me, okay, no... no. Please don't cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye... yes, no, uh, okay.


Niko: “ “Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!”
==Other dialogue==
===Niko exits the car===
'''Roman''': I need to show you our place, ''come back Niko.''


Roman: “Huh! No! no way! What’s the time? Shit… I’ve got to get the cab back. It’s on a shift.”
'''Roman''': I thought we were a team? ''Come back Niko.''


''He takes a gulp of his coffee and accidently spits it at Niko.''
'''Roman''': How you going to find your way round the city without me? Come back Niko. ''Don't be a child.''


Roman: “Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it!”
'''Roman''': ''Cousin, are you running away from me as soon as you get here?''


Niko: “Roman?
'''Roman''': Where you going, cousin? ''Niko don't be a dick.''


Roman:Niko, I’ve got to run, come meet me at the cab office.
'''Roman''': I'm drunk and tired Niko, please drive me home, ''be a good guy.''


Niko: “Jesus… what?
===Niko re-enters the car===
'''Roman''': Did you see everything you wanted to see? Can you drive your cousin home now?  


Roman: “It’s easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner,”
'''Roman''': What'd you do that for? Let's go home. ''If that is okay with his majesty?''


Niko: “What are you talking about? I don’t…”
'''Roman''': ''And stop with this weird behavior of yours.''


Roman: -go down one block and turn right on Iroquois,
'''Roman''': I will show you around more, later.


Niko: “I’m new here…”
'''Roman''': Oh, you're back. Can we go home now? ''Please, important sir.''


Roman: -then walk all the way down and we’re right there on the left on the corner of Cisco Street. It’s really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors. Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here, cousin… I’ve got something for you.”
'''Roman''': ''Egomaniac!''


''His phone is ringing''
[[Category:Scripts for GTA IV]]
 
Roman: “Oh, damn… damn, damn, damn! Yes, Vlad, sorry, forgive me, okay, no… no. Please don’t cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye… Yes, no, uh, okay.”
 
''Roman has left his apartment''
[[Category:Scripts]]
[[Category:GTA IV Scripts]]

Latest revision as of 20:16, 17 April 2015

The following is a script of the mission "The Cousins Bellic" in Grand Theft Auto IV.

Script

Dave Bosoy: Daddy's back, you bitches... Daddy's back, you bitches!

Niko Bellic: Dave, come on. [knocking on door] Come on Dave.

Hossan Ramzy: Niko? What are you doing?

Niko Bellic: Dave is not coming.

Hossan Ramzy: Ah, ignore him. Come on we got to get this thing ready before we dock.

(Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy climb a ladder to a higher deck)

Hossan Ramzy: Let's go. Here, pass me that. There. Whooh yeah! There she is... Liberty City.

Niko Bellic: Yeah.

Hossan Ramzy: You ever been?

Niko Bellic: No.

Hossan Ramzy: Crazy place, Niko.

Niko Bellic: What you going to do?

Hossan Ramzy: I might come back on board... or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say, it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big... own a nice place, get a dog, a house... live the dream!

Niko Bellic: Like my cousin.

Hossan Ramzy: Oh yeah?

Niko Bellic: Yes - he's got the lot - house, women, cars, parties... he writes me in these wild emails, and after I got into trouble, I thought maybe uh... and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget... After the war finished, I couldn't get a job, nobody could... so I, uh, did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots...

Hossan Ramzy: Ahh, we all do dumb things... that's what makes us human.

Niko Bellic: Could be.

(Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy disembark and Niko waits for his cousin)

Roman Bellic: Niko! My cousin! I can't believe it! You're here!

Niko Bellic: Hey!

Roman Bellic: Welcome to America!

Niko Bellic: Good to see you, cousin.

Roman Bellic: What?

Niko Bellic: Good to see you, man - what, you forget our language?

Roman Bellic: Uhhh... cabbages? Maybe a little. I've been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned off the English girls with the big...

Niko Bellic: Hey, a little... not so good.

Roman Bellic: Ahh, you'll be fine. Better than my Serbian. So good to see you cousin. I can't believe you made it! Ha! Shit... I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I've made it!

(Roman Bellic stumbles around)

Roman Bellic: Shit, man, I'm still a touch drunk.

Niko Bellic: A touch?

Roman Bellic: My cousin is here!

Niko Bellic: Woah! Roman, Roman, come on, come on, relax.

Roman Bellic: We're going to rule the world!

Dock worker #1: Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy. Just take over the world someplace else, alright?

Dock worker #2: Yeah, buddy! Take off!

Dock worker #1: You're in the Goddamn way.

Roman Bellic: Screw you... screw you all!

Dock worker #2: Hey, come on, man!

Roman Bellic: My cousin is here! Niko Bellic! He's the fucking man, bitches!

Niko Bellic: Roman, come on, let's go... to the mansion, eh?

Roman Bellic: Yes, the mansion! Whoa.

(Roman Bellic stumbles)

Roman Bellic: Maybe you should drive...

Niko Bellic: Maybe I should.

Roman Bellic: Okay!

Niko Bellic: Okay. Hey is this a cab? Where's the sports car?

Roman Bellic: Err, it's in the shop... come on!

(Niko Bellic begins to drive Roman Bellic back to his 'mansion')

Roman Bellic: Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it's just up the road. I'll let you know when we're there.

(Niko Bellic continues driving Roman Bellic home)

Niko Bellic: Why don't you show me around the city?

Roman Bellic: Fucking terrorists.

Niko Bellic: What?

Roman Bellic: Terrorists. There's been a big scare and you can't go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa, I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.

(Niko drives past the cab depot)

Roman Bellic: That is my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money.

or:

Roman Bellic: We are passing the cab office, Niko. This is the business that will take us to the top of the pile.

Roman Bellic: Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with? I thought I had died and gone to heaven, man.

Niko Bellic: I can't prove that I have.

Roman Bellic: Cousin, it's been too long... you should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you've been missing out on!

Niko Bellic: Our country has women too.

Roman Bellic: Yes, but only locals. Here we have white, black, the Puerto Ricans and the Asians, Europeans on vacation, scared Canadians, bored housewives from the Midwest - every possible choice. The city is like a big Uder Milken Ice Cream shop: thirty-six flavors of titty. Hove Beach is our little corner of Eastern Europe.

Niko Bellic: What a charming image. Hove Beach, next to the docks. Immigrants here do not make it very far from the boats they come in on.

Roman Bellic: No, everyone seems happy where they are. It reminds them of the Black Sea or something - people leave home to hang around the people they ran away from, very odd. Is just temporary for us though. Our sights are set for the top. Mansions in Berchem, penthouse in Algonquin... a model on each arm - me and my cousin Niko, rulers of the world!

(Niko drives Roman to his apartment)

Niko: This is the mansion?

Roman: Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That's the dream... follow me.

(Niko and Roman enter the apartment)

Roman: Come in, come in! Make yourself at home... what's mine is yours!

(Roman stamps on a cockroach)

Roman: Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn't care.

(Roman wipes the cockroach of his shoe)

Roman: Oh... shit... oh, that's not nice. Ah, cousin, it's so good to see you! Yeah! Hmm...

(Roman lies down on the bed)

Roman: Shit... well, I needed to change anyway... So!

Niko: So...

Roman: So...

Niko: So, you full of crap, or what?

Roman: What?

Niko: Where's luxury condo? Where's sports car? Where's Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?

'Roman: What you talking about?

Niko: In your letters to my mother, in your letters to me... all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Sports cars, condos, women, money, the beach... opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches.

Roman: That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!

Niko: Screw you, you idiot!

Roman: Okay, I'm an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.

Niko: Yeah, this I know. Asshole.

Roman: But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?

Niko: What? What about me?

Roman: Well... why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you're running around with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you're here. You never tell me anything.

Niko: Huh. No.

Roman: What do you mean no?

Niko: No, I never tell you anything. Another time.

Roman: Oooh, mystery man... strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?

Niko: Screw you! No, no, it's nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war... we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!

Roman: Huh! No! No way! What's the time? Shit... I've got to get the cab back. It's on a shift.

(Roman drinks his coffee but spits it back out)

Roman: Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it...

Niko: Roman...

Roman: Niko, I've got to run, come meet me at the cab office.

Niko: Jesus... what?

Roman: It's easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner...

Niko: What are you talking about? I don't...

Roman: Go down one block and turn right on Iroquois...

Niko: I'm new here...

Roman: then walk all the way down and we're right there on the left of the corner of Cisco Street.

Niko: What are you talking about, man?

Roman: It's really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors... Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here cousin... I've got something for you.

(Roman's phone rings)

Roman: Oh, damn... damn, damn, damn!

(Roman answers his phone)

Roman: Yes, Vlad, sorry, forgive me, okay, no... no. Please don't cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye... yes, no, uh, okay.

Other dialogue

Niko exits the car

Roman: I need to show you our place, come back Niko.

Roman: I thought we were a team? Come back Niko.

Roman: How you going to find your way round the city without me? Come back Niko. Don't be a child.

Roman: Cousin, are you running away from me as soon as you get here?

Roman: Where you going, cousin? Niko don't be a dick.

Roman: I'm drunk and tired Niko, please drive me home, be a good guy.

Niko re-enters the car

Roman: Did you see everything you wanted to see? Can you drive your cousin home now?

Roman: What'd you do that for? Let's go home. If that is okay with his majesty?

Roman: And stop with this weird behavior of yours.

Roman: I will show you around more, later.

Roman: Oh, you're back. Can we go home now? Please, important sir.

Roman: Egomaniac!