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The following are dialogue and mission scripts as heard during "[[The Cousins Bellic]]" in [[Grand Theft Auto IV]].
The following is a '''script''' of the mission "[[The Cousins Bellic]]" in [[Grand Theft Auto IV]].
 
Things spoken in a different language will be highlighted in '''bold.'''


== Script ==
== Script ==
'''Dave Bosoy''': Daddy's back, you bitches... Daddy's back, you bitches!


''The game starts with the picture fading from black, showing an erotically dressed woman hitting a man, (Dave), with a sado whip. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': Dave, come on. [knocking on door] Come on Dave.
 
[[Dave Bosoy|Dave]]: “Daddy’s back, you bitches… Daddy’s back, you bitches!”
 
''Outside the door stands GTA IV’s main character, Niko Bellic, knocking at the door. ''
 
[[Niko Bellic]]: “Dave, come on. Come on, Dave!”
 
''Another man comes into the picture''
 
[[Hossan Ramzy]] : “Niko, what are you doing?”


Niko: “Dave, he's not coming”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Niko? What are you doing?


Hossan: “Ah, ignore him. Come on, we got to get this thing ready before we dock. Let’s go”
'''Niko Bellic''': Dave is not coming.


''Niko follows Hossan. ''
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Ah, ignore him. Come on we got to get this thing ready before we dock.
''Camera is set outside, showing the boat they’re on. ''


Hossan: “Here, pass me that. There”
(''Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy climb a ladder to a higher deck'')


''Niko gives him his baggage and climbs up the ladder. The two men spot the big city''
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Let's go. Here, pass me that. There. Whooh yeah! There she is... Liberty City.


Hossan: “Whooh, yeah! There she is… Liberty City.
'''Niko Bellic''': Yeah.


Niko: “Yeah”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': You ever been?


Hossan: “You ever been?”
'''Niko Bellic''': No.


Niko: “No”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Crazy place, Niko.


Hossan: “Crazy place, Niko.”
'''Niko Bellic''': What you going to do?


''Inside the boat are some people rigging up a car to a platform. ''
'''Hossan Ramzy''': I might come back on board... or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say, it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big... own a nice place, get a dog, a house... live the dream!
''Picture is coming to Niko again''


Niko: “What you going to do?”
'''Niko Bellic''': Like my cousin.


Hossan: “I might come back on board… or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say; it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big… own a nice place, get a dog, a house… Live the dream!”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Oh yeah?


Niko: “Like my cousin.
'''Niko Bellic''': Yes - he's got the lot - house, women, cars, parties... he writes me in these wild emails, and after I got into trouble, I thought maybe uh... and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget... After the war finished, I couldn't get a job, nobody could... so I, uh, did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots...


Hossan: “Oh yeah?”
'''Hossan Ramzy''': Ahh, we all do dumb things... that's what makes us human.


Niko: “ Yes – he’s got the lot – house, women, cars, parties… he writes me these wild emails, and after I got into trouble I thought maybe uh… and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget…”
'''Niko Bellic''': Could be.


''The picture shows the other crew men again, showing a cook putting diamonds in his baking. ''
(''Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy disembark and Niko waits for his cousin'')


Niko: “After the war finished I couldn’t get a job, nobody could… So I did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots.”
'''Roman Bellic''': Niko! My cousin! I can't believe it! You're here!


Hossan: “Ahh, we all do dumb things. That’s what makes us human.”
'''Niko Bellic''': Hey!


Niko: “Could be.”
'''Roman Bellic''': Welcome to America!


''The boat docks. A machine lifts the car from the boat and onto the dock. All the people on the boat gets off to the dock, running to their awaiting girlfriends or other family. Everybody, except Niko. A man bumps into Niko. ''
'''Niko Bellic''': ''Good to see you, cousin.''


Niko: “Hey!”
'''Roman Bellic''': What?


''Soon every person has left the dock. Niko is standing there waiting. The camera is filming the road outside the docks, showing a car driving towards the docks at full speed. The car is skidding, narrowly missing a moving platform holding a car. Niko’s smiling, realizing it’s his cousin driving the car''
'''Niko Bellic''': Good to see you, man - what, you forget our language?


[[Roman Bellic]]: “Niko! My cousin! I can’t believe it, you’re here!
'''Roman Bellic''': Uhhh... ''cabbages?'' Maybe a little. I've been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned off the English girls with the big...


Niko: “Hey!”
'''Niko Bellic''': Hey, a little... not so good.


Roman: “Welcome to America!
'''Roman Bellic''': Ahh, you'll be fine. Better than my Serbian. So good to see you cousin. I can't believe you made it! Ha! Shit... I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I've made it!


Niko: “'''''Good to see you, cousin'''''.”
(''Roman Bellic stumbles around'')


Roman: “What?”
'''Roman Bellic''': Shit, man, I'm still a touch drunk.


Niko: “Good to see you, man – what, you forgot our language?
'''Niko Bellic''': A touch?


Roman: “Uhhh… '''''cabbages'''''?
'''Roman Bellic''': My cousin is here!


Roman: “Maybe a little. I’ve been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned of the English girls with the big…”
'''Niko Bellic''': Woah! Roman, Roman, come on, come on, relax.


Niko: “Hey, a little… not so good”
'''Roman Bellic''': We're going to rule the world!


Roman: “Ahh, you’ll be fine. Better than my Serbian.”
'''Dock worker #1''': Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy. Just take over the world someplace else, alright?


''He grabs Nikos baggage''
'''Dock worker #2''': Yeah, buddy! Take off!


Roman: “So good to see you, cousin. I can’t believe you made it! Ha! Shit… I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I’ve made it.”
'''Dock worker #1''': You're in the Goddamn way.


''He puts his baggage into his rear trunk. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Screw you... screw you all!
''He opens a bottle of unspecified vodka and drinks it.''


Roman: “Shit, man, I’m still a touch drunk.”
'''Dock worker #2''': Hey, come on, man!


''He nearly falls over''
'''Roman Bellic''': My cousin is here! Niko Bellic! He's the fucking man, bitches!


Niko: “A touch?
'''Niko Bellic''': Roman, come on, let's go... to the mansion, eh?


''Roman starts to shout out. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Yes, the mansion! Whoa.


Roman: “My cousin is here!”
(''Roman Bellic stumbles'')


''Some workers look over at the commotion Roman's causing. ''
'''Roman Bellic''': Maybe you should drive...


Niko: “Woah! Roman, come on. Come on, relax.”
'''Niko Bellic''': Maybe I should.


Roman: “We’re going to rule the world!
'''Roman Bellic''': Okay!


:“Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy.
'''Niko Bellic''': Okay. Hey is this a cab? Where's the sports car?


Worker 2: “Just take over the world someplace else, alright?”
'''Roman Bellic''': Err, it's in the shop... come on!


Worker 1: “Yeah, buddy!”
(''Niko Bellic begins to drive Roman Bellic back to his 'mansion''')


Worker 2: “You’re in the goddamn way.
'''Roman Bellic''': Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it's just up the road. I'll let you know when we're there.


Roman: “Screw you… Screw you all! My cousin is here!”
(''Niko Bellic continues driving Roman Bellic home'')


Niko: “Hey, come on, man!”
'''Niko Bellic''': Why don't you show me around the city?


Roman: “Niko Bellic! He’s the fucking man, bitches!”
'''Roman Bellic''': Fucking terrorists.


Niko: “Roman, come on, let’s go… to the mansion, eh?
'''Niko Bellic''': What?


Roman: “Yes, the mansion! Whoah.
'''Roman Bellic''': Terrorists. There's been a big scare and you can't go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa, I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.  


''Roman stumbles.''
(''Niko drives past the cab depot'')


Roman: “Maybe you should drive…”
'''Roman Bellic''': That is my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money.


Niko: “Maybe I should.”
or:


Roman: “Okay!”
'''Roman Bellic''': We are passing the cab office, Niko. This is the business that will take us to the top of the pile.


Niko: “Okay. Hey, is this a cab? Where’s the sports car?
'''Roman Bellic''': Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with? ''I thought I had died and gone to heaven, man.''


Roman: “Err, it’s in the shop… come on!”
'''Niko Bellic''': ''I can't prove that I have.''


----
'''Roman Bellic''': Cousin, it's been too long... you should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you've been missing out on!


''Now it’s the player driving.''
'''Niko Bellic''': Our country has women too.


Roman: “Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it’s just up the road. I’ll let you know when we’re there.
'''Roman Bellic''': Yes, but only locals. Here we have white, black, the Puerto Ricans and the Asians, Europeans on vacation, scared Canadians, bored housewives from the Midwest - every possible choice. The city is like a big Uder Milken Ice Cream shop: thirty-six flavors of titty. Hove Beach is our little corner of Eastern Europe.


Niko: “Why don’t you show me around the city?”
'''Niko Bellic''': ''What a charming image.'' Hove Beach, next to the docks. Immigrants here do not make it very far from the boats they come in on.


Roman: “Fucking terrorists”
'''Roman Bellic''': No, everyone seems happy where they are. It reminds them of the Black Sea or something - people leave home to hang around the people they ran away from, ''very odd''. Is just temporary for us though. Our sights are set for the top. Mansions in Berchem, penthouse in Algonquin... a model on each arm - me and my cousin Niko, rulers of the world!


Niko: “What?”
(''Niko drives Roman to his apartment'')


Roman: “Terrorists! There has been a big scare and you can’t go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa. I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.”
'''Niko''': This is the mansion?


''The Cousins Bellic drive past Roman's cab depot. ''
'''Roman''': Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That's the dream... follow me.


Roman: “That’s my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money. Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with?''' ''I thought I had died and gone to Heaven, man'''''.”
(''Niko and Roman enter the apartment'')


Niko: “'''''I can’t prove that I have'''''.”
'''Roman''': Come in, come in! Make yourself at home... what's mine is yours!


Roman: “Cousin, It’s been too long… You should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you’ve been missing out on!”
(''Roman stamps on a cockroach'')


Niko: "Our country has women too."
'''Roman''': Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn't care.


Roman: "Yes, but only locals. Here we have white, black, the Puerto Ricans and the Asians, Europeans on vacation... scared Canadians, bored housewives from the Midwest - every possible choice. The city is like a big Uder Milken Ice Cream shop: thirty-six flavors of titty. Hove Beach is our little corner of Eastern Europe."
(''Roman wipes the cockroach of his shoe'')


Niko: "'''What a charming image. '''Hove Beach, next to the docks. Immigrants here do not make it very far from the boats they com in on."
'''Roman''': Oh... shit... oh, that's not nice. Ah, cousin, it's so good to see you! Yeah! Hmm...


Roman: "No, evreyone seems happy where they are. It reminds them of the Black Sea or something - people leave home to hang around the people they ran away from, '''very odd. '''Is just temporary for us though. Our sights are set for the top. Mansions in [[Berchem]], penthouse in [[Algonquin]]... a model on each arm - me and my cousin Niko, rulers of the world!"
(''Roman lies down on the bed'')


''Roman's cab stops outside a mediocre apartment building in Hove Beach. ''
'''Roman''': Shit... well, I needed to change anyway... So!


Niko: “This is the mansion?”
'''Niko''': So...


Roman: “Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That’s the dream… Follow me.
'''Roman''': So...


----
'''Niko''': So, you full of crap, or what?


''They’re walking in''
'''Roman''': What?


'''Niko''': Where's luxury condo? Where's sports car? Where's Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?


''''Roman''': What you talking about?


Roman: “Come in, come in! Make yourself at home… what’s mine is yours!”
'''Niko''': In your letters to my [[Milica Bellic|mother]], in your letters to me... all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Sports cars, condos, women, money, the beach... opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches.


''Roman runs forward, and stomps on a cockroach''
'''Roman''': That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!


Roman: “Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn’t care…”
'''Niko''': Screw you, you idiot!


Roman: “Oh… shit… Oh, that’s not nice… Ah, cousin, it’s so good to see you! Yeah!”
'''Roman''': Okay, I'm an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.


''Roman jumps onto his bed and lands on another cockroach.''
'''Niko''': Yeah, this I know. Asshole.


Roman: “Shit.. well, I needed to change anyway. So!”
'''Roman''': But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?


Niko: “So…”
'''Niko''': What? What about me?


Roman: “So…”
'''Roman''': Well... why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you're running around with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you're here. You never tell me anything.


Niko: “So, you full of crap, or what?”
'''Niko''': Huh. No.


Roman: “What?
'''Roman''': What do you mean no?


Niko: “Where’s luxury condo? Where’s sports car? Where’s Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?”
'''Niko''': No, I never tell you anything. Another time.


Roman: “What you talking about?
'''Roman''': Oooh, mystery man... strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?


Niko: “In your letters to my [[Milica Bellic |mother]], in your letters to me… all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Sports cars, parties, women, money, the beach… opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches!
'''Niko''': Screw you! No, no, it's nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war... we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!


Roman: “That’s right, I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!”
'''Roman''': Huh! No! No way! What's the time? Shit... I've got to get the cab back. It's on a shift.


Niko: “Screw you, you idiot!”
(''Roman drinks his coffee but spits it back out'')


Roman: “Okay, I’m an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.
'''Roman''': Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it...


Niko: “Yeah, this I know. Asshole.
'''Niko''': Roman...


Roman: “But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?”
'''Roman''': Niko, I've got to run, come meet me at the cab office.


Niko: “What? What about me?”
'''Niko''': Jesus... what?


Roman: “Well… why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you’re running with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you’re here. You never tell me anything.
'''Roman''': It's easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner...


Niko: “Huh.. No.
'''Niko''': What are you talking about? I don't...


Roman: “What do you mean ‘no’?”
'''Roman''': Go down one block and turn right on Iroquois...


Niko: “No, I never tell you anything. Another time.
'''Niko''': I'm new here...


Roman: “Oooh, mystery man… strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?”
'''Roman''': then walk all the way down and we're right there on the left of the corner of Cisco Street.


Niko: “Screw you! No, no, it’s nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse…
'''Niko''': What are you talking about, man?


''Niko turns over to Roman. He is asleep''
'''Roman''': It's really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors... Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here cousin... I've got something for you.


Niko: “ “Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!”
(''Roman's phone rings'')


Roman: “Huh! No! no way! What’s the time? Shit… I’ve got to get the cab back. It’s on a shift.
'''Roman''': Oh, damn... damn, damn, damn!


''He takes a gulp of his coffee and accidently spits it at Niko.''
(''Roman answers his phone'')


Roman: “Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it!”
'''Roman''': Yes, [[Vladimir Glebov|Vlad]], sorry, forgive me, okay, no... no. Please don't cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye... yes, no, uh, okay.


Niko: “Roman?”
==Other dialogue==
===Niko exits the car===
'''Roman''': I need to show you our place, ''come back Niko.''


Roman:Niko, I’ve got to run, come meet me at the cab office.
'''Roman''': I thought we were a team? ''Come back Niko.''


Niko: “Jesus… what?
'''Roman''': How you going to find your way round the city without me? Come back Niko. ''Don't be a child.''


Roman: “It’s easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner,”
'''Roman''': ''Cousin, are you running away from me as soon as you get here?''


Niko: “What are you talking about? I don’t…”
'''Roman''': Where you going, cousin? ''Niko don't be a dick.''


Roman: -go down one block and turn right on Iroquois,
'''Roman''': I'm drunk and tired Niko, please drive me home, ''be a good guy.''


Niko: “I’m new here…”
===Niko re-enters the car===
'''Roman''': Did you see everything you wanted to see? Can you drive your cousin home now?


Roman: -then walk all the way down and we’re right there on the left on the corner of Cisco Street. It’s really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors.
'''Roman''': What'd you do that for? Let's go home. ''If that is okay with his majesty?''


Niko: "-what are you talking about man?"
'''Roman''': ''And stop with this weird behavior of yours.''


Roman: Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here, cousin… I’ve got something for you.
'''Roman''': I will show you around more, later.


''His phone is ringing''
'''Roman''': Oh, you're back. Can we go home now? ''Please, important sir.''


Roman: “Oh, damn… damn, damn, damn! Yes, Vlad, sorry, forgive me, okay, no… no. Please don’t cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye… Yes, no, uh, okay.”
'''Roman''': ''Egomaniac!''


''Roman has left his apartment''
[[Category:Scripts for GTA IV]]
[[Category:Scripts]]
[[Category:GTA IV Scripts]]

Latest revision as of 20:16, 17 April 2015

The following is a script of the mission "The Cousins Bellic" in Grand Theft Auto IV.

Script

Dave Bosoy: Daddy's back, you bitches... Daddy's back, you bitches!

Niko Bellic: Dave, come on. [knocking on door] Come on Dave.

Hossan Ramzy: Niko? What are you doing?

Niko Bellic: Dave is not coming.

Hossan Ramzy: Ah, ignore him. Come on we got to get this thing ready before we dock.

(Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy climb a ladder to a higher deck)

Hossan Ramzy: Let's go. Here, pass me that. There. Whooh yeah! There she is... Liberty City.

Niko Bellic: Yeah.

Hossan Ramzy: You ever been?

Niko Bellic: No.

Hossan Ramzy: Crazy place, Niko.

Niko Bellic: What you going to do?

Hossan Ramzy: I might come back on board... or I might try to make a go of it. Like they say, it is the land of opportunity. I always wanted to make it big... own a nice place, get a dog, a house... live the dream!

Niko Bellic: Like my cousin.

Hossan Ramzy: Oh yeah?

Niko Bellic: Yes - he's got the lot - house, women, cars, parties... he writes me in these wild emails, and after I got into trouble, I thought maybe uh... and then I got this gig, and I spend the next seven months with you fine people and I forget... After the war finished, I couldn't get a job, nobody could... so I, uh, did some dumb things and got involved with some idiots...

Hossan Ramzy: Ahh, we all do dumb things... that's what makes us human.

Niko Bellic: Could be.

(Niko Bellic and Hossan Ramzy disembark and Niko waits for his cousin)

Roman Bellic: Niko! My cousin! I can't believe it! You're here!

Niko Bellic: Hey!

Roman Bellic: Welcome to America!

Niko Bellic: Good to see you, cousin.

Roman Bellic: What?

Niko Bellic: Good to see you, man - what, you forget our language?

Roman Bellic: Uhhh... cabbages? Maybe a little. I've been here 10 years! You can speak English. Remember, we learned off the English girls with the big...

Niko Bellic: Hey, a little... not so good.

Roman Bellic: Ahh, you'll be fine. Better than my Serbian. So good to see you cousin. I can't believe you made it! Ha! Shit... I have to tell you I had quite a night last night. Two women! The land of opportunity. I've made it!

(Roman Bellic stumbles around)

Roman Bellic: Shit, man, I'm still a touch drunk.

Niko Bellic: A touch?

Roman Bellic: My cousin is here!

Niko Bellic: Woah! Roman, Roman, come on, come on, relax.

Roman Bellic: We're going to rule the world!

Dock worker #1: Yeah, yeah, whatever, buddy. Just take over the world someplace else, alright?

Dock worker #2: Yeah, buddy! Take off!

Dock worker #1: You're in the Goddamn way.

Roman Bellic: Screw you... screw you all!

Dock worker #2: Hey, come on, man!

Roman Bellic: My cousin is here! Niko Bellic! He's the fucking man, bitches!

Niko Bellic: Roman, come on, let's go... to the mansion, eh?

Roman Bellic: Yes, the mansion! Whoa.

(Roman Bellic stumbles)

Roman Bellic: Maybe you should drive...

Niko Bellic: Maybe I should.

Roman Bellic: Okay!

Niko Bellic: Okay. Hey is this a cab? Where's the sports car?

Roman Bellic: Err, it's in the shop... come on!

(Niko Bellic begins to drive Roman Bellic back to his 'mansion')

Roman Bellic: Drive us to our place on Mohawk, it's just up the road. I'll let you know when we're there.

(Niko Bellic continues driving Roman Bellic home)

Niko Bellic: Why don't you show me around the city?

Roman Bellic: Fucking terrorists.

Niko Bellic: What?

Roman Bellic: Terrorists. There's been a big scare and you can't go across the bridges so good. You, without a visa, I would stay in Broker. Fuck it, stay in Hove Beach. Everyone like us does.

(Niko drives past the cab depot)

Roman Bellic: That is my cab depot, cousin. It is where I make all the money.

or:

Roman Bellic: We are passing the cab office, Niko. This is the business that will take us to the top of the pile.

Roman Bellic: Niko, you ever had two women at once? Four big titties to be playing with? I thought I had died and gone to heaven, man.

Niko Bellic: I can't prove that I have.

Roman Bellic: Cousin, it's been too long... you should have come out earlier. Think of all the girls you've been missing out on!

Niko Bellic: Our country has women too.

Roman Bellic: Yes, but only locals. Here we have white, black, the Puerto Ricans and the Asians, Europeans on vacation, scared Canadians, bored housewives from the Midwest - every possible choice. The city is like a big Uder Milken Ice Cream shop: thirty-six flavors of titty. Hove Beach is our little corner of Eastern Europe.

Niko Bellic: What a charming image. Hove Beach, next to the docks. Immigrants here do not make it very far from the boats they come in on.

Roman Bellic: No, everyone seems happy where they are. It reminds them of the Black Sea or something - people leave home to hang around the people they ran away from, very odd. Is just temporary for us though. Our sights are set for the top. Mansions in Berchem, penthouse in Algonquin... a model on each arm - me and my cousin Niko, rulers of the world!

(Niko drives Roman to his apartment)

Niko: This is the mansion?

Roman: Just a temporary place. The mansion is coming, cousin. That's the dream... follow me.

(Niko and Roman enter the apartment)

Roman: Come in, come in! Make yourself at home... what's mine is yours!

(Roman stamps on a cockroach)

Roman: Got him! Little bastard. If he paid some rent I wouldn't care.

(Roman wipes the cockroach of his shoe)

Roman: Oh... shit... oh, that's not nice. Ah, cousin, it's so good to see you! Yeah! Hmm...

(Roman lies down on the bed)

Roman: Shit... well, I needed to change anyway... So!

Niko: So...

Roman: So...

Niko: So, you full of crap, or what?

Roman: What?

Niko: Where's luxury condo? Where's sports car? Where's Barbara with big titties and Stephanie who sucks like a vacuum?

'Roman: What you talking about?

Niko: In your letters to my mother, in your letters to me... all I hear about is Mr. Big, Mr. Roman, living the American dream. Sports cars, condos, women, money, the beach... opportunity! I come here, and the only thing big about your life is the cockroaches.

Roman: That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!

Niko: Screw you, you idiot!

Roman: Okay, I'm an idiot, but you must admit I have the best line in bullshit you ever heard.

Niko: Yeah, this I know. Asshole.

Roman: But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do okay. Now, maybe I have this. But what about you? What about you, cousin?

Niko: What? What about me?

Roman: Well... why you leave home after all this time? First, I hear you're running around with the wrong kind, then I hear you joined the merchant navy, now you're here. You never tell me anything.

Niko: Huh. No.

Roman: What do you mean no?

Niko: No, I never tell you anything. Another time.

Roman: Oooh, mystery man... strange and exotic sailor! What happened? Did your captain make you pregnant?

Niko: Screw you! No, no, it's nothing like that. The ships were fine. It was before that, two things. You remember, during the war... we did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman? Roman! Are you sleeping, you fat fuck? Come on!

Roman: Huh! No! No way! What's the time? Shit... I've got to get the cab back. It's on a shift.

(Roman drinks his coffee but spits it back out)

Roman: Oh, Jesus! Tastes like a rat shat in it...

Niko: Roman...

Roman: Niko, I've got to run, come meet me at the cab office.

Niko: Jesus... what?

Roman: It's easy. Out the door, turn left, then the first left at the diner...

Niko: What are you talking about? I don't...

Roman: Go down one block and turn right on Iroquois...

Niko: I'm new here...

Roman: then walk all the way down and we're right there on the left of the corner of Cisco Street.

Niko: What are you talking about, man?

Roman: It's really flash. We got lots of titties and some incredible motors... Niko. Give me a hug. Good to have you here cousin... I've got something for you.

(Roman's phone rings)

Roman: Oh, damn... damn, damn, damn!

(Roman answers his phone)

Roman: Yes, Vlad, sorry, forgive me, okay, no... no. Please don't cut my cock off, eh? Oh, okay, bye... yes, no, uh, okay.

Other dialogue

Niko exits the car

Roman: I need to show you our place, come back Niko.

Roman: I thought we were a team? Come back Niko.

Roman: How you going to find your way round the city without me? Come back Niko. Don't be a child.

Roman: Cousin, are you running away from me as soon as you get here?

Roman: Where you going, cousin? Niko don't be a dick.

Roman: I'm drunk and tired Niko, please drive me home, be a good guy.

Niko re-enters the car

Roman: Did you see everything you wanted to see? Can you drive your cousin home now?

Roman: What'd you do that for? Let's go home. If that is okay with his majesty?

Roman: And stop with this weird behavior of yours.

Roman: I will show you around more, later.

Roman: Oh, you're back. Can we go home now? Please, important sir.

Roman: Egomaniac!