The Job/Script
The following is a script for The Job, a mission in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City.
Tommy Vercetti: As you can see, gentlemen, this is going to be the easiest buck we ever made.
Ken Rosenberg: Tommy, seriously, you gotta consider going into law.
Phil Cassidy: What the hell are you smoking, man? This ain't no simple plan! Well, who needs a simple plan anyway? Take communism, now that was a simple plan. Didn't do Russia any favors, huh?
Tommy Vercetti: Calm down, all right? With a team like this it's going to be no problem. We got Cam on safe. Phil? You and me will handle security, and Hilary'll drive the getaway car.
Ken Rosenberg: Uh, heh heh, aren't you forgetting somebody? Somebody who helped you to no end in this town? Somebody who...
Tommy Vercetti: Ken... Ken, that's right. Ken here, he washes the money for us and he keeps the drinks on ice.
(Laughter)
Hilary King: I don't understand what I am supposed to be doing here.
Tommy Vercetti: Look, it's easy. Haven't you ever seen a movie? We walk into the bank, we wave the gun around, and leave very rich men.
(Outside Malibu Club)
Tommy Vercetti: I'll drive.
Hilary King: Great. A passenger. Wait 'til I tell the group about this.
(Tommy drives the team to the bank)
Cam Jones: Tommy, Hilary's taking up too much room!
Hilary King: I am not!
Cam Jones: Are too!
Tommy Vercetti: Hey, shut up you two, or you can get out and walk.
Cam Jones: Yeah - HILARY.
(After driving a while)
Tommy Vercetti: For god's sake, Phil, stop waving that thing around!
(If Tommy damages the car too much)
Hilary King: The car's ruined. RUINED!
Cam Jones: You cling to an illusion of permanence.
Hilary King: What?
Cam Jones: You think all things will last. Youth, loved ones, pizza, all will pass or end and you must accept that.
Hilary King: You're right. Thanks Cam.
Cam Jones: Don't mention it.
(If Tommy gets out of the taxi before reaching the bank)
Hilary King: Hey Tommy, why have we stopped?
(The team arrives at the El Banco Corrupto Grande.)
Tommy Vercetti: Keep driving around the block, OK?
Hilary King: Okay, Tommy, okay.
(Hilary drives away. The team goes to the bushes beside the bank and changes outfits.)
Tommy Vercetti: Ok, guys. Nice and easy just as we planned.
(The team raids the bank.)
Tommy Vercetti: THIS IS A RAID! NOBODY MOVE! EVERYBODY UP AGAINST THAT WALL! Phil, hold down the fort!
Phil Cassidy: Wilco roger that!
Tommy Vercetti: Come on, Cam. The vault's upstairs...
(Tommy and Cam head upstairs to the vault. Cam examines the vault.)
Cam Jones: Damn! It's a Flange 9000! This could take hours to crack. Or five minutes if you can find the manager.
Tommy Vercetti: I'll go see where he's holed up.
(Tommy heads downstairs.)
Tommy Vercetti: Phil, things still sweet?
Phil Cassidy: Sure. Everything's reeaal quiet.
(Tommy arrives at the manager's office.)
Tommy Vercetti: You - you're coming with me.
Manager: Ok! Ok! Just don't shoot!
(Tommy approaches the elevator.)
Phil Cassidy: I SAID NOBODY MOVE!
(Tommy takes the manager to the vault.)
Manager: It's on a time lock, You might as well give up now!
Cam Jones: Hell, I can bypass the time lock, Then we just need your key code and we're good!
Tommy Vercetti: Stay here. Try to do anything and you're dead. I'll go check on Phil, I'll be right back.
(Tommy heads back up but suddenly the alarm goes off.)
Phil Cassidy: I told you not to touch that alarm! The SWAT team will be here any minute! I could do with some help here, Tommy!
SWAT (voice): Vice City S.W.A.T! You are completely surrounded!
Phil Cassidy: Surrounded? HA HA HA HAAAAAaaa! They're crapping themselves, corrupt bastards!
Cam Jones: Tommy! The vault's open.
Tommy Vercetti: OK. We got SWAT retirement funds. Let's get out of here!
SWAT (voice): Okay! You asked for it! You got your last chance!
Phil Cassidy: They're storming the place! Take cover!
(Phil and Tommy kill all the attacking SWAT)
Phil Cassidy: That's the last of them. GO! GO! GO!
(Outside the bank, if Cam died.)
Phil Cassidy: Where's Cam?
Tommy Vercetti: History...
Phil Cassidy: Shit! Where's Hilary? I'll give him abandonment issues!
(Outside the bank.)
Phil Cassidy: Shit! Where's Hilary? I'll give him abandonment issues!
(Hilary arrives in the taxi.)
Hilary King: Hey guys! Get in! I got you covered!
(The SWAT kills Hilary. Tommy, Phil and Cam head back to Cam's Can Openers.)
Phil Cassidy: We made it! We're rich! RICH!!
Mercedes Cortez: Tommy, would you like a massage?
Tommy Vercetti: Oh, hi there Mercedes. Yeah, I'm feeling a little tense.
Kent Paul: What'd I tell you Tommy? What'd I tell you? Bent SWAT better watch out when Kent Paul is in town! Come on, gimme a bigger slice, mate, c'mon. I gotta get some new threads.
(If Cam got killed.)
Phil Cassidy: We made it! We're rich! RICH!
Tommy Vercetti: Shame Cam didn't make it, he was a good guy!
Phil Cassidy: Yeah.
Tommy Vercetti: Still... more for us!
Phil Cassidy: Damned straight! YEEEEHAAAH!
Mercedes Cortez: Tommy, would you like a massage?
Tommy Vercetti: Well, Hi there, Mercedes! Yeah, I'm a little tense...
Kent Paul: What'd I tell you Tommy? What'd I tell you? Bent SWAT better watch out when Kent Paul is in town. Come on, gimme a bigger slice, mate, c'mon. I gotta get some new threads.