Three's a Crowd/Script

The following is a script of the mission Three's a Crowd in Grand Theft Auto IV.

Roman: Come on Dardan, what's your problem?

Dardan: I don't have problem. You do.

(Bledar smashes Roman's computer)

Roman: Don't be a dick, man... come o...

(Bledar gets Roman in a headlock)

Dardan: Where's your Russian friend now, eh?

Roman: He's not my friend... he's my loan shark...

(Niko walks in)

Niko: Stop this.

Dardan: Who are you?

Niko: Get out of here.

Roman: Niko...

Niko: Yes.

(Niko grabs Dardan's arm and breaks it)

Dardan: Oh, my arm. Oh!

Niko: (to Bledar) And what about you?

(Bledar let's go of Roman and helps Dardan)

Dardan: Help me! Help me!

Niko: Come on, asshole!

Dardan: Bledar! Help me!

Niko: Get out of here now! And if you come back, I'll kill you! You understand?

(Roman picks up Dardan's knife and throws it at them)

Roman: You forgot this, you Albanian pricks!

Roman: Shit, Niko - what did you do?

Niko: He was going to stab me.

Roman: Now he's going to kill you!

Niko: Fuck him.

Roman: Look at this mess. Screwed! Again. You want to know why I'm not living in a nice condo, banging four women? It's because of shit like this. Assholes threatening me.

Niko: Shut up!

(Roman's phone rings)

Roman: Oh great... Mallorie. Hey, beautiful! Huh? Yeah... great. Uh... listen, I'm having a bit of a problem at the office... Umm, I can't do it - Niko can do it...

Niko: Huh? Do what?

Roman: Well why would you want me then? Well screw you, then. Great girl... can you do me a favor? Mallorie needs a lift. Can you go pick her up at the Hove Beach subway station?

Niko: Yeah...

Roman: Take the cab. She's got a friend with her. Maybe someone you can date!

Niko: Fuck you.

Roman: Oh, man, look at this crap. My computer and everything.

Dialogue

(Niko drives to the subway station)

Niko: Get in, ladies.

Mallorie: He Niko, thanks for coming. I should have known Roman would find some excuse not to turn up. This is Michelle.

Michelle: Hi. How are ou? My place is over on Mohawk Avenue. How're you finding American, Niko?

Niko: Not exactly what I expected.

Mallorie: Niko, you know what? You need someone to show you a good time. Michelle, how about you?

Michelle: Mallorie. Stop it!

Mallorie: Come on you guys. You're both single, you're adults. Take her number, Niko.

Michelle: Hey, I'd like to see you again, Niko. You look like that kind of guy I want to get to know.

Mallorie: You look like you just jumped off the boat, Niko. Handsome man like you should get some new threads.

Michelle: I think he looks fine the way he is.

Mallorie: I don't think he even changed out of those things on the journey. How you going to impress a class girl like Michelle?

Michelle: I'm easily impressed.

Mallorie: I know you are, sweetie, and I just don't get it.

(Niko drops the girls off)

Mallorie: Thanks for the lift, Niko.

Michelle: Yeah, thanks. Gimme a call sometime.

Niko: See you soon, Michelle.

(Niko calls Roman)

Niko: Cousin, I dropped the girls off. The friend gave me her number, but I don't think Mallorie likes my clothes so much.

Roman: I know just the place for you, it's on Mohawk in Hove. Go and get something a bit more twenty-first century.