Bull in a China Shop/Script

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The following is a script of the mission Bull in a China Shop in Grand Theft Auto IV.


Mel: Ah, fuck you! You're a bunch of pussies and fags.

Mickey: Nice.

Mel: I'm going back to the meetings.

Mickey: Good.

Mel: I'm going to be somebody!

Mickey: Yeah, yeah. See you later, Mel.

Mel: You always were an asshole, Mickey...

Mickey: Hey! What where you're going.

(Mel stumbles into Niko and Niko pushes him down)

Niko: Hey!

Mickey: I tried to tell ya.

Mel: Fuck you...

Niko: Excuse me.

(Niko walks to Vlad who is with Ivan)

Vlad: So, Ivan - I see you later, okay? Yokel, fatty Roman's cousin... what's your name again?

Niko: Big mouth prick.

Vlad: Very catchy, sit down. Cousin... Niko... that's it, Niko... not big mouth prick. You funny guy.

Niko: I try.

Vlad: Yes... and this once, I let you take the shit out of me.

Niko: Take the shit?

Vlad: Yes, mickey about.

Niko: I don't understand.

Vlad: People who fuck with me get fucked with!

Niko: Okay, fine. Calm down.

Vlad: Whatever, some old man not paid me in months, and I'm not kind of person who is treated this way. Old bastard owns a china shop on Camden Avenue in Dukes. Here you go... Don't hurt him. Just teach him a lesson.

Niko: I don't need a bat to teach a lesson.


(Niko goes to the store)

Niko: Hey, let me in. You owe Vlad protection money, old man.

Shop owner: Big Vlad and his protection money. I so scared. What I need protection from?

Niko: You think this door is going to save your shop? There's shit I can break out here.

Shop owner: Vlad should pay me to tell punks like you to go away. He get no money.

(Niko smashes the window)

Shop owner: Stop it, shit brain. I pay up now, I pay up.

Shop owner: Shit. Here. I thought Vlad and I had understanding?

Niko: Only thing I understood was you owed him money.


Shop owner: Here's your money. I hope you and Vlad choke on it.

Niko: Sure, whatever.


(Niko smashes the window before talking to the shop owner):

Shop owner: What fuck you doing? You pay for that, crazy man.

Niko: You should have paid Vlad his protection money.

Shop owner: Point proven. I get it.

(Niko takes the money back to Vlad)

Vlad: Hey yokel, you manage to do the job? Get Vlad his money

Niko: He paid up. I had to smash the shop up pretty good, but he paid.

Vlad: Don't worry our little peasant head about it. Stupid jerk made a mistake of telling me how much he gets that shit for back east. He's the biggest crook in the neighborhood. Lucky I don't tell his customers what they're paying for.

Niko: That it? Can I go now?

Vlad: Sure, get out of my face.

Post mission text message

Yokel, come see me for more work. - Vlad

Post mission phone call

Roman: Niko, how you doing? This is so much fun.

Niko: You know Roman, I haven't been having that much fun since I got here. Has been a lot like hard work.

Roman: Well, you should hang out with your cousin more often.

Niko: Maybe that is the problem.

Roman: Ha ha. I'm sitting here with Brucie. Well, we're sitting here and calling the cops and watching them show up and look around. The fucking stupid bastards.

Niko: You shouldn't cry wolf, Roman. Who knows when you will really need help.

Roman: Fuck, I think they see us. Have to go, Niko.

Failing the mission

Shop owner is killed

Niko: Vlad, I scared the old man too much. He's dead.

Vlad: Stupid peasant, think about it. Dead men can't pay me money. Now you cousin's going to have to owe me for this as well.