Lick Those Loonies!

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Lick Those Loonies! (known as Kill Loonies! in the Playstation version) is a mission in Grand Theft Auto 2 given to Claude Speed by Trey Welsh of the Zaibatsu. The mission is available from one of the yellow Zaibatsu phones in Zarelli of the Downtown District.


The Loonies have interfered with Zaibatsu's drug business and Trey wants revenge by blowing up their garage.


Trey: Trey Welsh here. The Loonies have slipped narcotics in the water supply and hit my drugs business. Revenge will be simple. First, you need a special Loony Dementia.

(Claude arrives at the Loony Garage.)

Trey: The Loony guards seem a bit twitchy. Make sure they don't spot you.

(Claude steals the Dementia.)

Trey: OK, Gecko, here's the plan... Take the Dementia to the Bomb Shop and rig it with explosives. Then return the rigged Dementia to the Loony Garage and blow the Loons to the Moon.

(Claude takes the car to the Bomb Shop.)

Bomb Shop owner: The vehicle's been rigged! That's $5000.

Trey: The party's over in Crazy Town, Gecko. Dump the rigged Dementia in the Loony Garage and set the explosives.

(Claude drives the car to the garage and it explodes.)

Trey: Shit, Gecko, a group of crack Loonies are on their way. You need reinforcements - and fast. Take the Van and meet the Z-Men at North-West Zarelli.

(Claude gets in the Van.)

Trey: Now go pick up the Z-Men.

(Claude reaches the Z-Men.)

Trey: The Z-Men will get in the Van when you blast the horn.

(Claude presses the horn and the Z-Men get in.)

Trey: Excellent, Gecko, you got the Z-Men. Now head for the Loony Garage and nail that band of crazies!

(Claude reaches the Garage and kills the Loonies.)

Trey: I like your style, Gecko! Such professionalism in the face of adversity deserves to receive $40,000.


Mission completion rewards the player with $40,000.