- For Franklin Clinton
- Jimmy De Santa: Yo F-dog! Ive added you on Lifeinvader accept my request and we can hang! Hit me up anytime bro… ANYTIME and we goin chop it. Peace - Jizzle
From Jimmy to Franklin
Jimmy De Santa: Franklin!
Franklin Clinton: Wassup, bro. You good?
Jimmy De Santa: Yeah ummm, trill. Trill, homie.
Franklin Clinton: How’s your dad?
Jimmy De Santa: Yeah, umm, fine, I guess. I mean, he should be, right? He got you to help him out with stuff. I don’t really see what he’s adding to this partnership.
Franklin Clinton: Eh, look bro, man, I don’t wanna say too much on this phone, but things ain’t good where I’m from, man, you know. Ain’t no glamour like you thinkin’, and, um, man, I’m sick of puttin’ myself out, man, and not getting’ paid, homie. Now you dad, he seem like a dude who put himself out, and got something to show for it. So I’m hoping some of that shine rub off on me, man. You feel me?
Jimmy De Santa: Did you just say the streets are tough and it’s tough if you’re, like, a good man in a bad world? I share your pain, homie. For real. Homies for life.
Franklin Clinton: Yeah man, I gotta go.
From Simeon Yetarian to Franklin
Franklin Clinton: Eh, look, man...
Simeon Yetarian: "Look"? You were like a son to me. Employee of the Month! Does that mean nothing to you?
Franklin Clinton: Man, the dude had a gun to my head.
Simeon Yetarian: No loyalty! No integrity! You should have taken the bullet! My business. My totally legitimate business. You are fucked, my boy. Fucked!
From Lamar Davis to Franklin
- Only if the mission Chop has been completed.
Franklin Clinton: Wassup, homie.
Franklin Clinton: Yeah, man, it's cool. It's the best place for him, anyway.
Lamar Davis: HA. Like it ain't nobody out there gunning for your black ass. Bullshit, nigga. Just take care of him, man, alright?
Franklin Clinton: Alright, I got you, dog.
Terror on the highway.
Motorists on the Del Perro Freeway were thrown into a panic when a high-speed gun battle broke out between two vehicles, one of which was carrying a yacht. What sparked the clash and the identity of the two groups of men involved is not yet known, but this leads us to our reader poll of the day: "Is a drive-by shootout over a luxury yacht a sign that Los Santos is in economic crisis, or out of economic crisis?"
Classic 60s arthouse film returns to local theaters.
To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Emanuelle Pasorelli's legendary picture, Capolavoro is returning to local theaters. As confusing as it was when the movie debuted, the story winds its way through the mind of a man who betrayed his best friend and is fighting with retirement, his wife, and himself. The dialog is in several languages, adding to the art of it. Art isn't supposed to be understood by just anyone and this is a prime example of something you can feel good about yourself for getting through.
Celebrities still choosing Epsilon program.
Despite recent controversies, including a court case over accusations of being a cult, more and more celebrities are choosing to become Epsilonists. The Epsilon Program, a Los Santos based religion that has been derided, attacked, ridiculed and accused of everything from charlatanism and fraud to slavery and prostitution continues to grow. Yesterday, at an Epsilon event in Los Santos, several celebrities revealed they were committed Epsilonists and vowed to help spread the message. Prominent actor Bruce Spade told reporters "I'm a patriot so I wanted an American religion, because I believe in America and that's what Epsilonism is all about." Celebrity and internet entrepreneur Tony McTony told reporters "I have an incredible sense of self worth and that's what Epsilonism encourages – it has really helped me understand why I am so important." Heartthrob and rising star, Jimmy Boston announced "Cris Formage is a prophet. He saw something in me and since then my career has really taken off. Now I've got a couple movies lined up. If that isn't a cool religion, I don't know what is." The Epsilon Program also announced a plan to recruit one hundred trillion more members within five years which will ensure they will remain the world's fastest growing religion for quite a while.
Los Santos Transit Authority to shut streets?
The Los Santos Transit Authority announced a 16 billion dollar project to install a network of streetcar rails throughout the city. "People love streetcars. They are in a lot of old movies, and you can jump on or off. And sometimes a woman gets on the streetcar in tears, and it starts to pull away, and then you chase after it, but it's too fast, and you never see her again. So you go to a boozy gin mill and pick up a floozy sitting next to you, secretly loathing her and yourself. We think this will be a big boost to tourism." City official Jack Ingram said. Others say that it's a massive waste of money in a town addicted to cars. Still others say they welcome the streetcars as something new to throw yourself in front of.
Chinese steal drug market.
Not content with attacking the fundamentals of our capitalist economy with their cheap labor and vibrant industrial base, it appears that China is now coming after our shadow economy. At a press conference earlier today announcing new intergovernmental strategies to combat drug trafficking, a spokesperson from Globopol revealed that criminal organizations from mainland China are attempting to infiltrate the US drug market. The international policing organization claims that senior gang members from a number of Chinese organized crime families have entered the country illegally in recent months, including the Wei Cheng Triad that operates out of Yangshan in Guangdong.
A number of updates from Weazel News can be heard on the radio. These include:
- Bring your assult rifle to work day', which had been a hit for the previous five years but caused 109 deaths in 2012, had been cancelled. Concealed hand gun Thursday, however, is still going.
- That the Gentry Manor Hotel is haunted by celebrity ghosts, which tourist Shadeen Swanson states are as 'boring as real live ones'.
- A pipe line to bring water from Canada to San Andreas.
- That a man talking about a glutton free diet was made homeless by family and that he is disliked by his family, friends and co-workers.
- An update on medical marijuana and how a medical marijuana school is failing.
- Chiropractor Mike Evans saying that he has slept with over 3,000 people,
Michael De Santa's page
- Jimmy De Santa: So yeah sorry about the boat I was just trying to use my initiative and make a contribution to the finances like you keep saying I need to. Gotta get creative in a recession! At least I was outside right??? That home invader turned out to be pretty cool, btw.
Amanda De Santa's page
- Kyle Chavis: My schedule's wide open let me know when he isn't around.
Jimmy De Santa's page
- Jimmy De Santa: So that boat thing didn't work out. Lucky for me my dad's a lunatic or I could be dead right now!
- Jimmy De Santa: Oh and I did I mentioned that my dad is now best friends with the burglar who broke into our house? Don’t even ask.
Tracey De Santa's page
- Tracey De Santa: That adult film guy Freddie has invited me to hang out on his yacht with all his entertainment industry friends. So cool! This could totally open doors for me.
- Tracey De Santa: My mom won’t let Gary stay the night. Why's she the only one who gets to be the whore? She is such a dictator!
- @debbiebabes85: If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery I must be really trying to impress a drunken slut.
- @muttonjohnpoo #westcoastcrazy: You know you're in Los Santos when... there's a driveby shootout on the Del Perro Freeway over a yacht. #westcoastcrazy
- @tonymctony: To the person who started the rumors about me getting leg extensions at Implant Outsource – I'll sue you so hard your inbred great-grandbabies will still owe me money.
- @SeriousCougarShow #HospicelsHot: Congrats to Jesse Turner – he's put Mildred Keene in the ground with a smile on her face - #HospicelsHot
- @profkevin_2cool: "Does it look like I give a shit?" is a great example of a rhetorical question.
- @SueMurry: I used to teach my class that just because Juan's lunch smells weird and is wrapped in a leaf doesn't make him different or better. Latinos have a special place in my heart. www.SueMurry.com
- @PussycatPorn: Congratulations to Holly Waterpark for taking the Loudest Pregnant Milf Orgasm award last night. Her Golden Dong trophy didn't make it past security.
- @veggie_suej: Guess what...I'm on vacation...AGAIN! One of these days my life will get shitty. Luv u all xxxxx
- @SorryCommodeBand: Sorry Vice City – we were too wasted to play – but your local drugs are fantastic!
- @fearfirst27: Just heard those Merryweather private soldier psychos from Iraq and shit are in LS!
- From FLEECA.com
Cash Deposit: $2,000
- Jimmy De Santa (including the option to "hang out")
- Michael De Santa (including the option to "hang out")
Michael De Santa
- Franklin Clinton (including the option to "hang out")